Norm
Wizard
Seat time: There is no Substitute
The best advice regarding motorcycling I ever received was from a mechanic at my Yamaha dealer. He said: “Ride Norm ride. Stop reading and ride. You want to be a good rider? Then ride.” I love it. I trusted him to service my bike. So why shouldn’t I trust his philosophy? Simple, yet profound. There have been many cases of people faking their credentials and doing complex jobs. Fake doctors, lawyers, and pilots. The amazing thing is a lot of these people were pretty good. Why? They didn’t have all the rhetoric and useless theory that goes along with training for these jobs. They just DID the job…over and over again and usually with such passion and will to succeed at convincing others that they emulated the real thing to a scary T.
Yea I know the theory and rhetoric isn’t really useless. But so few of us remember to reincorporate it once the rubber hits the road that it may as well be useless. Faking it till you’re making it. It can be done. I recommend 10,000 miles as the point at which you are an official rider. Ideally it should be done in a span of less than 3 years with two years or less being ideal. The 10,000 miles should break down as follows:
1) 5000 highway miles: The highway will give you many looks. High winds some days, headwinds, tail winds, quartering winds, winds that come off of semis, car haulers and other vehicles. The highway on a bike, for some reason, reminds me of the ocean on a boat. Every time out feels a little different. You also must master countersteer to be safe on the highway.
2) 3000 miles on twisties. It doesn’t have to be the tail of the dragon. With the exception of Florida everyone knows where they can find some twisties within a half hour of their home. If you want to make sure you’re ready for the big times give the Saw Mill Parkway a try. It’s a fast road with twisties galore and nice banks in the turns but a guardrail on one side and brazen deer on the other leaves no room for error. A if that wasn’t enough, every New Yorker with a fast car does 80 or more on that road because hiding spots for cops are limited and it really tests what their car is capable of doing. Use extreme caution on this road!
3) Find the busiest grocery store and go up and down the isles while cars pull out in front of you, old people walk right in front of you, cars stop short unpredictably (like while you’re in a turn), and little kids escape the clutches of their parents in an attempt to die under your front tire.
4) Find the biggest incline you can and practice stopping and starting on the incline. On occasion down hill can be tricky too. I once stalled out on a sharp decline thinking I had more speed from the road than I did and let the clutch out too fast.
5) Get the mail at the end of your driveway with the bike. Sounds stupid right? Try it without getting off your bike.
6) Pillion: You are endangering your own life on a bike. Don’t take a pillion till you have mastered riding yourself. When you do you’ll see it’s twice as hard as riding yourself. A lot of accomplished riders I know refuse to take a pillion mostly because they do not want to put anyone else in harm’s way. Some of them are fine with their spouse riding on their own, for example, but they just don’t want to be responsible for two lives, or wipe out a child’s set of parents in one fell swoop. Their reasoning is sound and I find it hard to argue against their decision. Remember that a pillion entrusting their life to you is a tremendous honor and sign of respect. Don’t screw it up by showing off or doing anything that you haven’t done a hundred times yourself.
7) Ride through a busy city at rush hour. I don’t think this one needs too much explanation but what it really teaches you, besides excellent clutch control and slow speed prowess is to claim your space and protect this space as if you were in a car. Attitude is important here. Rush hour traffic can smell fear and any sign of weakness. Drivers know you’re crazy cause you’re on a bike in rush hour. Now just act the part. If you really want to fine tune your attitude try it on a Honda Helix. It’s hard to look tough on a Helix but it’s pretty easy to look crazy; and everyone’s afraid of a crazy person because you just never know what he’s going to do next since he appears to have no regard for his life or yours. Stare down a meek looking driver and then spit on the ground. Then sing a verse from the group “War” and start laughing. “Cisco kid was a friend of mine.” Then let out a big Dr. Evil laugh! Actually letting out anything after that should work.
Well I think that about does it. Bikes weren’t made to be coat hangers or storage shelving for garage supplies. Stay thirsty for riding my friends.
Disclaimer: I’m not a motorcycle expert but I was able to get the gas station air pump to fill my tires today. I mean seriously, what idiot designed the valves on motorcycles to be impenetrable to air pumps.
The best advice regarding motorcycling I ever received was from a mechanic at my Yamaha dealer. He said: “Ride Norm ride. Stop reading and ride. You want to be a good rider? Then ride.” I love it. I trusted him to service my bike. So why shouldn’t I trust his philosophy? Simple, yet profound. There have been many cases of people faking their credentials and doing complex jobs. Fake doctors, lawyers, and pilots. The amazing thing is a lot of these people were pretty good. Why? They didn’t have all the rhetoric and useless theory that goes along with training for these jobs. They just DID the job…over and over again and usually with such passion and will to succeed at convincing others that they emulated the real thing to a scary T.
Yea I know the theory and rhetoric isn’t really useless. But so few of us remember to reincorporate it once the rubber hits the road that it may as well be useless. Faking it till you’re making it. It can be done. I recommend 10,000 miles as the point at which you are an official rider. Ideally it should be done in a span of less than 3 years with two years or less being ideal. The 10,000 miles should break down as follows:
1) 5000 highway miles: The highway will give you many looks. High winds some days, headwinds, tail winds, quartering winds, winds that come off of semis, car haulers and other vehicles. The highway on a bike, for some reason, reminds me of the ocean on a boat. Every time out feels a little different. You also must master countersteer to be safe on the highway.
2) 3000 miles on twisties. It doesn’t have to be the tail of the dragon. With the exception of Florida everyone knows where they can find some twisties within a half hour of their home. If you want to make sure you’re ready for the big times give the Saw Mill Parkway a try. It’s a fast road with twisties galore and nice banks in the turns but a guardrail on one side and brazen deer on the other leaves no room for error. A if that wasn’t enough, every New Yorker with a fast car does 80 or more on that road because hiding spots for cops are limited and it really tests what their car is capable of doing. Use extreme caution on this road!
3) Find the busiest grocery store and go up and down the isles while cars pull out in front of you, old people walk right in front of you, cars stop short unpredictably (like while you’re in a turn), and little kids escape the clutches of their parents in an attempt to die under your front tire.
4) Find the biggest incline you can and practice stopping and starting on the incline. On occasion down hill can be tricky too. I once stalled out on a sharp decline thinking I had more speed from the road than I did and let the clutch out too fast.
5) Get the mail at the end of your driveway with the bike. Sounds stupid right? Try it without getting off your bike.
6) Pillion: You are endangering your own life on a bike. Don’t take a pillion till you have mastered riding yourself. When you do you’ll see it’s twice as hard as riding yourself. A lot of accomplished riders I know refuse to take a pillion mostly because they do not want to put anyone else in harm’s way. Some of them are fine with their spouse riding on their own, for example, but they just don’t want to be responsible for two lives, or wipe out a child’s set of parents in one fell swoop. Their reasoning is sound and I find it hard to argue against their decision. Remember that a pillion entrusting their life to you is a tremendous honor and sign of respect. Don’t screw it up by showing off or doing anything that you haven’t done a hundred times yourself.
7) Ride through a busy city at rush hour. I don’t think this one needs too much explanation but what it really teaches you, besides excellent clutch control and slow speed prowess is to claim your space and protect this space as if you were in a car. Attitude is important here. Rush hour traffic can smell fear and any sign of weakness. Drivers know you’re crazy cause you’re on a bike in rush hour. Now just act the part. If you really want to fine tune your attitude try it on a Honda Helix. It’s hard to look tough on a Helix but it’s pretty easy to look crazy; and everyone’s afraid of a crazy person because you just never know what he’s going to do next since he appears to have no regard for his life or yours. Stare down a meek looking driver and then spit on the ground. Then sing a verse from the group “War” and start laughing. “Cisco kid was a friend of mine.” Then let out a big Dr. Evil laugh! Actually letting out anything after that should work.
Well I think that about does it. Bikes weren’t made to be coat hangers or storage shelving for garage supplies. Stay thirsty for riding my friends.
Disclaimer: I’m not a motorcycle expert but I was able to get the gas station air pump to fill my tires today. I mean seriously, what idiot designed the valves on motorcycles to be impenetrable to air pumps.
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