Looking Yourself in the Eye

Norm

Norm

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Tomorrow will be the one year anniversary of that fateful day. I can lie to myself but I know that I've thought about my life without Jake. I thought about the blissful ignorance of never knowing this tragedy. I've thought I was weak and didn't deserve to have such a great kid. I've thought that there are millions of people around the world who have known much greater tragedies and whined much less.

Religious, spiritual, or none of that, whichever you consider yourself, you are the composite of the experiences you have accumulated in life. I looked myself in the eye today (the picture above) and today I can only come up with one conclusion. Tomorrow, and the rest of my days may be a different conclusion. But today I am thankful for friends here and around me, my family, especially my daughter, the light of my life, and all those good souls out there who have helped me get through my life.
 
Norm, I feel like I know you even though we have never met. I always look forward to reading what you have to say. The eloquence and thought provoking content of your posts is more than I could have ever expected from a motorcycle forum. I appreciate all the regulars here very much, but I must say, I anticipate reading your posts more than others.

I am greatly saddened that you have a topic like this, but I can only hope that you find some solace in sharing your feelings with all of us here. The pain of your loss will always be there, but time has a way of quieting the hurt. I don't believe you'd ever want it to totally go away. It is, as you say, a part of you now. I don't know your faith and I don't mean to offend, but I am Christian and fully believe God can help turn horrible loss and pain to positive directions.

I pray for you and everyone that your son touched because I know his absence has left an empty hole. This is only because it meant something to know him, and that can be remembered with a smile. I hope when you look yourself in the eye, you always see the best parts of Jake with you.
 
Of no religion I wish to offer you this Indian Prayer Norm. Jake will always be with you in spirit where your warmest memories of him will live on forever.



Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glint on snow,
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain,
when you wake in the morning hush.
I am the swift uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft starlight at night.
Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
~~Author Unknown​
 
it seems to me that you have become stronger since the loss of your son. like maybe you weren't so sure of yourself along the way of the past year, but now realize that you were always strong or recognize that you have become stronger. idk if that made any sense, but my thoughts are with you at this tough time of reflection for you norm.
 
Norm,
Please remember this. It will be much sadder when it does'nt hurt anymore.
Your pain is an unbounded love. God Gave you the emotions. Use them.

I feel for you and your loss. And pray for your strength.

You do have caring friends here that understand how you feel.

God Bless.
 
FZ1inNH said:
Of no religion I wish to offer you this Indian Prayer Norm. Jake will always be with you in spirit where your warmest memories of him will live on forever.



Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glint on snow,
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain,
when you wake in the morning hush.
I am the swift uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft starlight at night.
Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
~~Author Unknown​
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Eric, this has to be one of the nicest prayers I have ever come across. Thanks for posting it, not only for Norm, but for all of us.
 
Norm, I only hope that each year you look in that same mirror and snap a photo of yourself. And I hope and pray that each year that passes, the sadness that shows in this photo, gives way to happiness and a smile because I know in my heart that Jake doesn't want to see you hurting and would love to see you smiling again knowing that he is safe, out of any pain he may have had here on earth, and is waiting patiently for the time when you are face to face again. ;)
 
Just a few months before, at his High School Graduation. Maybe it's just me but I can see the sadness and the pain behind that smile and his eyes look deep as the ocean:

Jake-1.jpg
 
Now I don't want to seem out of place but I love this picture of Jake. I think that it would be great for Norm to use it as his avatar for the month of September as a memoriam to Jake, and so many of us that never had the pleasure to meet him in person, can at least put his likeness in our hearts and minds. If I'm out of line just let me know. Just a thought, thats all.
 
Norm your willingness to share stories of Jake and your grief,mourning,healing process humbles me. Having never met you I feel that I owe you a debt of gratitude. Reading your words of grief and healing have helped me more than I can tell you. My own personal troubles seem petty compared to your tragedy. Your devotion to the memory of your son is an inspiration.
I just got home from dinner with my, officially a teenager, daughter. I'm playing both Mom and Dad roles right now. Mom is living apart from us until the house is sold. Your posts have reminded me not to pass up the little things with kiddo. Hang in there pal. You seem to take the punches better than alot of folks. You're a champ!
 
Thank you all. Billy, can you make it my Avatar for me? I suck with this stuff. I think it has to be shrunk first at photobucket? Or just tell me how to do it.
 
Norm said:
Thank you all. Billy, can you make it my Avatar for me? I suck with this stuff. I think it has to be shrunk first at photobucket? Or just tell me how to do it.
Click to expand...

Norm, not sure if Billy is around, but I took care of the avatar for you. Came out great :)
 
I'm glad you liked the idea. I think it's an absolutely great tribute to young Jake. We need to keep it in the archives so that we have it with us for years to come. Thank you Tony for getting that done for Norm.
 
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